Depression No One Can Understand Unless They Have Had It PART II
Posted: Tuesday, June 05, 2007
by Kathy Somers
I had written a little article called Depression No One Can Understand Unless They Have Had It. It was published here on March 20th, 2007. I feel that I have more to add for those who are suffering with depression.
Before I begin, I just want to let you all know that I am having a really difficult time right now in my life also. It's not like I am sitting here typing this article out, all cured from depression and thinking I am a know it all. I just want to share with you people what I am doing to help myself, or how I am trying to cope with each day I am alive. Maybe we can do it together, what do you think of that?
After the boys came home and were on their way to recovery, she kept in touch with me. A couple of phone calls of chatting, I then went to visit her for a few minutes and brought her a piece of my homemade cheesecake (I made it myself and it's absolutely delicious). Before I get off track with my cheesecake story, I had better get back to what I was saying.
Diane invited me out for a coffee, but instead I went back to her home and met her daughter and husband. Beautiful people! She told me about this book that she wanted me to read. I didn't know if I wanted to read it or not because I am not much of a book person. Before I left her home she handed me the book and the title on it is "The Purpose Driven Life" What on Earth am I here for? by Rick Warren.
Well it laid on my counter top for a couple of days and each time I walked by it I thought I should read that, then I would think to myself 'nah'. I did end up picking up the book and started reading a few pages. I am so glad that Diane gave me that book to read. There are 40 chapters and you are to read one chapter a day till the book is done. The chapters are only 3-5 pages long. That’s my kind of book.
I am now on chapter 9 and I already feel like I have a purpose on this planet. I have a feeling that I have never had before in my life, it’s called belonging, nor did I ever understand why I was put on this planet. I just figured that I was stuck here, no reason to life, a failure to my family, myself and everyone around me, also a failure to my work place, and a failure to God.
I do believe in and love God; I believe that his son Jesus died on the cross for my sins. I believe the Bible is the Truth. I don’t attend church, and I don’t practice any religion, I was brought up Baptist. But this probably sounds like most of North America . I am certainly not a preacher or anywhere near that. Don't worry I am not going to write a sermon here. I just want to let you know what is helping me and this book has really helped me realize in just a few chapters that I am who I am, I am supposed to be here, I am not a mistake, and that God doesn’t make mistakes. (which I already knew, but I kind of figured I was a one)
If you want to hear a little how this book made me see a few things differently, then keep on reading. If not, well you know, close it down.
(The bold typing that you are going to see are words that I have quoted from this book)
The first few lines in the book read, This is more than a book; it is a guide to a 40-day spiritual journey that will enable you to discover the answer to life's most important question. What on earth am I here for? By the end of this journey you will know God's purpose for your life and will understand the big picture - how all the pieces of your life fit together. I want to know my purpose that’s for sure and I want you to know yours.
Chapter one: first sentence It's not about you. Well that did not clear things out of my head. What do you mean it's not about me; I am the one suffering here. BUT as I continued to read that chapter, it was right, it's not about me. Chapter two: first sentence You are not an accident. That made me think, maybe I am supposed to be here, and maybe all that negative thinking was just a waste of my energy and time. Did you notice that being depressed and thinking alot does take the enegry out of you? Your birth was no mistake or mishap, and your life is no fluke of nature. Your parents may not have planned you, but God did.....Long before you were conceived by your parents, you were conceived in the mind of God. He thought of you first, It is not fate, nor chance, nor luck, nor coincidence that you are here breathing at this very moment. You are alive because God wanted to create you! A new way to looking at my life was all summed up in that sentence. I am suppose to be here and I hope that sentence helps you also. Many children are unplanned by their parents, but they are not unplanned by God. God's purpose took into account human error and even sin. God never does anything accidentally and he never makes mistakes. He has a reason for everything he creates.....and every person was designed with a purpose in mind. God's motive for creating you was his love.
This is all I am going to tell you about this book for now, but as you can see it is very helpful to know that even though we are depressed. We are supposed to be here for a certain purpose; we just have to find out what that is. Maybe we will never know till we die, but for some reason were here, for better or worse till death do us part and whether we like it or not.
If you want to hear a little how this book made me see a few things differently, then keep on reading. If not, well you know, close it down.
(The bold typing that you are going to see are words that I have quoted from this book)
The first few lines in the book read, This is more than a book; it is a guide to a 40-day spiritual journey that will enable you to discover the answer to life's most important question. What on earth am I here for? By the end of this journey you will know God's purpose for your life and will understand the big picture - how all the pieces of your life fit together. I want to know my purpose that’s for sure and I want you to know yours.
Chapter one: first sentence It's not about you. Well that did not clear things out of my head. What do you mean it's not about me; I am the one suffering here. BUT as I continued to read that chapter, it was right, it's not about me. Chapter two: first sentence You are not an accident. That made me think, maybe I am supposed to be here, and maybe all that negative thinking was just a waste of my energy and time. Did you notice that being depressed and thinking alot does take the enegry out of you? Your birth was no mistake or mishap, and your life is no fluke of nature. Your parents may not have planned you, but God did.....Long before you were conceived by your parents, you were conceived in the mind of God. He thought of you first, It is not fate, nor chance, nor luck, nor coincidence that you are here breathing at this very moment. You are alive because God wanted to create you! A new way to looking at my life was all summed up in that sentence. I am suppose to be here and I hope that sentence helps you also. Many children are unplanned by their parents, but they are not unplanned by God. God's purpose took into account human error and even sin. God never does anything accidentally and he never makes mistakes. He has a reason for everything he creates.....and every person was designed with a purpose in mind. God's motive for creating you was his love.
This is all I am going to tell you about this book for now, but as you can see it is very helpful to know that even though we are depressed. We are supposed to be here for a certain purpose; we just have to find out what that is. Maybe we will never know till we die, but for some reason were here, for better or worse till death do us part and whether we like it or not.
Another achievement that I conquered is that I finally got up out of my blaaa’s of staying in the house all the time and started walking ½ hr a day. This made a difference to me, I feel new and that my hope is coming back again.
I guess all boils down to taking baby steps, and we will fall down, get back up and try again.
I know that there are people out there that think they are alone, but your not. God loves you and he is there for you, and so am I.
There is one reason and purpose we are here and alive and that is to help each other.
While I was writing this my little 2 ½ year old came from outside and handed me this dandelion, after they get all fluffy and those seed things fly thru the air all over the place and make people who have allergies get all stuffed up in there sinuses. Not funny I know. Well the one he passed me had like only 5 or 6 little seed things in it. “ Mommy, pik flowr for mommy". I took it and put it in some water and then took a picture of it, because I thought it is the most beautiful flower ever and mostly because of the love that he had to pick it for me. Also it’s amazing that a little boy can see beauty in a half dead flower and think it’s beautiful and give it to someone he loves. Why can't we see the beauty in things the way children do. Guess it says in the bible somewhere that we are to have a heart of a child.
There is one reason and purpose we are here and alive and that is to help each other.
While I was writing this my little 2 ½ year old came from outside and handed me this dandelion, after they get all fluffy and those seed things fly thru the air all over the place and make people who have allergies get all stuffed up in there sinuses. Not funny I know. Well the one he passed me had like only 5 or 6 little seed things in it. “ Mommy, pik flowr for mommy". I took it and put it in some water and then took a picture of it, because I thought it is the most beautiful flower ever and mostly because of the love that he had to pick it for me. Also it’s amazing that a little boy can see beauty in a half dead flower and think it’s beautiful and give it to someone he loves. Why can't we see the beauty in things the way children do. Guess it says in the bible somewhere that we are to have a heart of a child.
They are so innocent and their little minds are so precious. We have to get better, I have to get better for my boys sake. I don’t want them to feel this way when they are grown.
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Top-level comments on this article: (8 total)That is one of the most wonderful things that mothers will remember the rest of their lives. I sure wish I had taken pictures of the first flower that my child gave to me.Actually I don't know what made me think to do that, but I am glad that I did. Maybe a new mom out there will read this and remember to do the same thing.
Nice article Kathy. I especially loved what you said about the kids and so sweet about the flowerThanks *big smile* :)
Kathy: Keep writing. You express yourself well and the honesty is refreshing. I hope you one day will find a nice church to attend. It's a spiritual gas station, and one never realizes how important it is until you try it. Emphasis on "nice". I'm your fan. Marty RicKard, author, poet.Hi there, Thank you so much for saying the nice things about my articles. I am trying to get myself out to church, and I can't make any excuses why I can't go except having a 1 and 2 year old keeping me so busy and church starting so early on Sundays, but I shouldn't let that stop me. I keep God close to my heart and talk to him daily and he is my best friend ever. Hopefully one of these days soon I hope I have the enegry to get going and get to church, I know it makes a person feel so much better in their heart. Have a great day Marty.
Hi Kathy, your story is heart warming and beautiful. Keep up the inspirational work for others. May God continue to give you the insight to encourage others and give them hope. God Bless to you. In Christ, AngieHi Angie...thank you for your comment, its really nice to receive positive feedback on something we write isn't it... I will try to write to help others but I am just new at this, so if you see any errors or something I could change or sharpen up on please let me know.
Hey Kathy, it's good to see you back here on SearchWarp!
I've re-read your articles on depression tonight, remembering the first time I read them. You are very good at writing down your thoughts so that others can understand them. I've said in the past that I could have written these articles except I'm just not so good at expressing my thoughts as you!
Anyway, I wish you the best... My depression still waxes and wanes, but it seems to always still be there no matter what. I struggle to tell myself that I will not always feel like this, but I sure have for such a very long time. It helps to hear that others are successfully coping with it.Take care.
Hi Jim, thank you for your comment, and as you I have felt like this a really long time as well. Some of those times are worse than others but it never seems to leave. Yesterday I did start back to the gym, first time in long time. It's hard to go very far with 2 little boys. But since it was Saturday and my husband didn't have to work, I made myself get up early and go. It felt really good and I did feel better that day. So today I got up and I went again, and after the gym I decided to take in church. Which I hardly ever do. But I called the minister whom I know and just asked if it was ok if I went in my gym clothes because I didn't have time to go home and change and get all cleaned up. The minister said, God doesn't care what you wear, just come along like you are, you are more than welcome. So after doing 2 things today that I know makes me feel better, I feel somewhat happy inside. It's work isn't it? To make ourselves feel better for the day, so all I can say is do something that makes you feel good about yourself everyday that you can bring yourself to do and you will smile inside. Yeah it's a hard life sometimes isn't it. If you ever need anyone to talk to just email me. You can find my email on my website Fun with UR Pictures
I had to re-read these articles today, still suffering from depression, but I think it has turned to anxiety attacks, stress, panic plus the depression, I must write an article soon on this. I just lost my mom 7 weeks ago, going through a divorce and just everything is a mess, but I just do what I said in my other article about depression...ONE Day at a Time.....I see my mom was the first to leave a comment...her name is Joan...I miss her. As soon as I get in gear I want to write about something on here, as I miss writing. Take care
I have to take my own advice sometimes :)
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